So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Multitasking record: pooping whilst putting on shoes and cleaning ear with q-tip. All while texting.
Update: fell off toilet, one shoe on, q-tip still in ear. Not a pro.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
