shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
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