You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
It's blow job season.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
