I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
we're so committed to being not committed
My vagina just clenched in fear
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
