god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
