that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
What a dumb baby whore.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
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