i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
