It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Randomize
