How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
my being single is dangerous.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Randomize
