Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
True strength comes from lack of pants
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