i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
