Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
