she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize
