The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
