U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Randomize
