What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
love makes seman taste better
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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