Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Randomize