I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
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Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
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See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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