I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
