508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Randomize
