i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
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