Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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