Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
