wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize