He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
