Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
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