I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
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