Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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