I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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