You don't have asthma, your pregnant
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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