Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...

  (1-405): View more from Oklahoma

  Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar

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  (405): I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace... (1-405): Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar http://tfl.nu/6slq
  Replies (16) Good night (1942) Bad night (622)
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser

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  (954): all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser http://tfl.nu/xbi4
  Replies (17) Good night (4701) Bad night (1402)
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.

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  (708): You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half. http://tfl.nu/enxi
  Replies (13) Good night (6490) Bad night (1212)
• Favorite

  (520): View more from Arizona

  So you had sex with my brother?

  (1-520): View more from Arizona

  It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.

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  (520): So you had sex with my brother? (1-520): It sounds like you dont need me to answer that. http://tfl.nu/xsv7
  Replies (8) Good night (5653) Bad night (1252)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.

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  (570): I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless. http://tfl.nu/rrlk
  Replies (6) Good night (3908) Bad night (709)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...

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  (970): I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house... http://tfl.nu/qa28
  Replies (4) Good night (3428) Bad night (1754)
• Favorite

  (316): View more from Kansas

  Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first

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  (316): Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first http://tfl.nu/7abn
  Replies (6) Good night (1530) Bad night (907)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  Crying in the liquor store is not a good look

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  (631): Crying in the liquor store is not a good look http://tfl.nu/r8cz
  Replies (4) Good night (681) Bad night (1382)
• Favorite

  (205): View more from Alabama

  I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.

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  (205): I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment. http://tfl.nu/97ug
  Replies (4) Good night (1829) Bad night (521)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.

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  (541): We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash. http://tfl.nu/8hyq
  Replies (1) Good night (787) Bad night (467)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups

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  (720): Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups http://tfl.nu/s3s5
  Replies (5) Good night (2338) Bad night (444)
• Favorite

  (252): View more from North Carolina

  Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "

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  (252): Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison " http://tfl.nu/v70i
  Replies (5) Good night (457) Bad night (938)
• Favorite

  (408): View more from California

  But college guys get to crossfade so there's that

  (305): View more from Florida

  No idea what that is

  (408): View more from California

  Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...

  (305): View more from Florida

  I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words

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  (408): But college guys get to crossfade so there's that (305): No idea what that is (408): Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together... (305): I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words http://tfl.nu/rs53
  Replies (8) Good night (1400) Bad night (280)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  Gross! What the hell is that?!?

  (623): View more from Arizona

  It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.

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  (404): Gross! What the hell is that?!? (623): It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon. http://tfl.nu/hr7g
  Replies (7) Good night (866) Bad night (327)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?

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  (206): sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches? http://tfl.nu/kl03
  Replies (6) Good night (959) Bad night (334)

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