Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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