I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
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