I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
tell me about the fingering
Randomize