Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
Randomize