I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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