its not stalking. its research.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
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