See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
