It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
