if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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