How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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