Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
It's never too late to be topless.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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