Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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