my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Randomize
