she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Randomize
