you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
