I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Alive.
So much puke
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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