You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
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