I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
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