party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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