I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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